MEN ARE GOALS

Men are... To me a man is a protector, a leader and a sower, a man according to creation is the manager of all humanity and creation, therefore that makes him a protector or custodian to all the wealth the earth has to provide. According to nature he names what he wants for his family, he decides the kind of life his children will have, he determines the future of his children and creates a legacy for them, therefore that makes him a leader.  Out of a seed of a man a nation arises and his name lives on, Out of his seed a heritage is preserved and the legacy of his offspring shall
forever remain, therefore a man is a sower. Men are kings, all we as women have to do is learn to recognize those who know who they are and run from those who don't.  A man who understands his truth will know how to treat those around him and a man who knows that he is a king will recognize his queen because only she can help him fulfil his destiny...

A shout out to all the kings who will not mind to let go of their empires if it means they get to keep their queens and to all the queens who will stick by their kings and make sure the empire is safe...

FUN IS

💋💋💋IS FUN REALLY ABOUT HEAVY DRINKING?

Since it's Friday and most of us can't wait for the weekend to begin,  I am sitting here wondering if the weekend is about going out, drinking and sex binging?.  if one can just take the time to walk around one would realise that some people have already drank themselves silly.  This took me to the time I used to work in Vereeniging, you'd get into a taxi on your way home and be met with the shame of some ladies your mothers age hooking up with men they have never met before,  there was a time during the festive season that two women in their late 50's got into a taxi drunk and loud and as they were busy recalling their activities earlier in that day a man about their age and equally drunk stumbled in to the taxi, to my shock one of the drunk ladies asked were he was because they could see that he had a great time and they were disappointed by the fact that they had not seen each other earlier, seeing that they were in the same drinking spot.  When the time came for these ladies to jump off the taxi they persuaded their newly found drinking buddy to come with.  By that time my mind was racing to this man's home as he had received his wages and now these leeching oldies were about to suck him dry, I could only imagine the shock and disappointment for his children and wife when he got home empty pocketed and probably mugged simply because he couldn't say No!!!.  But my biggest issue was the fact that these type of women who go to that particular spot were famous for initiating sex with these unsuspecting men in the quest to infect them with all kinds of infections including the HI virus.  People tend to make terrible and stupid choices all in the name of fun and once the time comes for them to deal with the consequences, they choose to shy away from being accountable, yes they choose to avenge themselves and a hard pillow to swallow is the fact that in many of the cases the ones that get hurt are often innocent and clueless of the hurt these perpetrators have gone through.
To anyone who is planning on going out tonight or any other night please think long and hard about the reason why you will be going out.  If its about socialising, enjoying good music, great food, good company, some good ambiance then go for it.  However if it is for drinking yourself into a stupor or having unprotected sex with strangers then don't even bother. Just hire yourself a few movies,  order some good pizza, buy your favourite beer and stay indoors.

It Friday lets take some time to take care of ourselves, recover from the week's madness and have some down time.  See you on the flip side... ciao

LIFE IS NO LONGER WHAT IS USED TO BE

Life has proved to be getting harder generation after generation. Which took me back to a time where this time of the year was a time we would be exited by little things like buying new clothes for Christmas and the first Sunday of the year, having the best and tastiest delicacies and looking forward to the school day for the year. I remember how we would wake up in the morning with so much zeal and happiness because going to New grade meant a step closer to being all grown and independent, yes the best and biggest dream we all had were about being able to afford anything and everything we wanted.

I was watching a series just now and someone said it was ironic that grown-ups spend all their time thinking about the past, while children spend their time thinking about the future. That got me thinking, is this how life is supposed to be? Are we meant to dream about a future we would later not want to live in? I don't think that's the true intention of life, I believe life is meant to be lived as it comes, I believe we have to be taught from a young age that the present is all life has to offer because the future is never guaranteed.

Live a meaningful and full life, give life your best shot. If you give life your best and don't live recklessly, your future is guaranteed whether you make it to your future or not.  But waking up day in and day out waiting for the future to start living is the most painful thing one can ever do to themselves, let us not think about life, let us live life. If we are respectful and considerate, believe me, the past and the future will definitely sort themselves out.

The sun is out and the summer body is loading.... I think this is a great time to enjoy the outside and get those cameras snapping

I'M IN LOVE WITH

❤❤❤I'M IN LOVE

Seems like we have invented new ideas about love or being in love.  The modern day meaning to being in love is being with a person who is able to buy you all the gifts money can buy or being able to fly to the most expensive shopping destinations and baecations.  In simple terms comforming to the standards of the words"the deeper the pockets the greater the love".  Someone recently said they would handle being beaten up in a relationship if it meant they would have the priviledge of being with a money'd man.  We live in an era where a man who buys you the latest spots car and the longest expensive waeves #touchmybumlength and turns and beats you into a pulp is  named a decent guy and the most gentle of them all.
For me being love is being with a person who motivates me to be an achiever and better person holistically, not having to feel insecure because i am constantly being told that i can't be ambitious, because my man or "sponsor" doesn't want an ambitious woman.  I'm in love with the idea of being called a QUEEN simply because no other name would be fit for me.  I'm in love with the thought of having someone working himself to the bone to keep to the promises he has made.  Yes i'm in love with letting someone to be comfortable to be around me, i'm in love with the thought of seeing them pushing towards being the best man.  To me being in love is not being able to wait to talk to that special someone,  Not being bothered by anything because you know there is someone who has your back, being in love to me is having someone walk with you through your best and hold you through your weakest.  Being in love is being with someone who will stand by you through your worst and love you through your everything. 

I'm in love with the thought of being able to be all that to someone else and allowing them to be all that for.  I'm in love with my KING ❤❤❤❤

💔💔💔MONDAY MORNING

Dear Monday morning do you always have to be this brutal?.  Why do you really have to be this inconsiderate?. I believe you did realise that the weekend was way too hectic for a lot of us, and yet you were cruel enough to come knocking at our doors, you could see that I was restless throughout the night and yet you let the cares of the world trouble me in the little time that i managed to sleep peacefully.  Monday morning I knew you were coming.  Yes I was expecting you,  I know you Monday morning and I know you never miss an appointment.  Yes i know that you keep to your promises and yes I do understand that you do not skip on your commitments.  I love you Monday and I respect your tenacity.  Yes I respect your honesty and how unapologetic you are about your presence.  You don't care if we partied too hard the previous weekend or if we were too busy to remember that you will be here and how you'll throw your weight around.  Monday morning i know you are always waiting to steal our blissful oblivion away from us and yes I have grown to realise that Sunday is too afraid of you that she can't wait to go.  Yes Sunday doesn't want to feel your harsh presence.   Monday morning I don't ask much from you,  however can you be a little understanding?. Can you show us some courtesy?.  I don't want to believe that you are comfortable with people and other days seeing you as a tyrant.  Monday morning my humble plea to you is that you come a little late.  I plead with you my beloved Monday Morning, will you please arrive at 80:00,  I for one would really appreciate it and i also believe that my fellow human inhabitants would also love you for it.

I hope to hear from you soon💋💋💋

Love and respect
Nthabiseng

If shoes where men, I'd be a whore

I love shoes, I have a special kind of a relationship with shoes, especially when they are bright coloured.  To me the type of a shoe one is wearing completes their entire outfit, you can dress to the nines and wear an ugly shoe or just a bad coloured shoe, that for me is the most disrespectful mistake that can mess up your whole outfit.

Is it an affair?

I walk into my favourite shoe store Joey & Sam, just by merely glancing through the doorway, all kinds of emotions rush through my entire body from the way the shoes are placed to the colours, the kinds and the designs.  I grab one shoe and hold it like a new born baby, my eyes so soft and my heart full of love and embrace, I feel bad yeah I feel real bad because I know I'm about to cheat, I'm about to cheat with another shoe. My attention is about to be stolen by another equally enticing beauty and in the period I'll spend at the store, I would be tempted to lick some of the shoes.  Some of them make me want to sing" Baby let me love you."  If Morris Chestnut was to walk past and wave at me I wouldn't even notice. The kind of focus I put in a relationship is the same kind I put when I'm around shoes, no outside force can distract me. And I always leave Joey and Sam fulfilled and I having feelings of possible multiple orgasms running through my entire body.  Yeah my love affair with shoes is all rounded.  It is a spiritual and emotional state of being, shoes make me happy, shoes are my biggest motivation and yes shoes are my first love...

Wear good shoes and walk like royalty. It's a Friday be fabulous be fashionable...

❤❤❤RELATIONSHIPS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO HURT

Relationships are supposed to be enjoyable.  Yes from time to time things won't go our way and that can lead to disagreements or even altercations , but that does not mean a relationship should remain a bed of thorns.  But what is it that forces us to settle for abusive relationships?  Over the years i have realized that a lot of people tend to idolize their partners way too much they end up failing to see flaws in those people,  and when the flaws are too big to be hidden they end up becoming too ashamed to walk away because everyone will think that they were too drunk in love to see that they were actually laying in the arms of a monster.  On the other hand a lot of us are afraid of starting over,  the thought of finding someone new, falling in love all over again and learning new patterns is reason enough for us to stay in toxic relationships.   At one stage in my life i have also being a victim of such, the thought of having to explain to my colleagues why the person i once claimed nothing could ever tear us apart was no longer in the picture was too embarrassing, and yes it made more sense to stay in that hopeless and hurtful predicament.  Needless to say that his cheating ways knocked sense into my senseless pride and i walked as fast as my feet could allow me.  What I'm trying to say is,  if you still feel like you are being taken for a fool every time your partner gives you an excuse for not picking up your call or if you are still not a part of your partners inner circle you are in the wrong place.  A person who wants you in their life will always include you in their plans and there is no other place they would rather be if it means you they can't take you with.  You know you have landed yourself a keeper if you are all they think about and if they go out of their way to make you happy and at peace.  The only thing you can do is to love them and assure them that they will always be cherished.

It doesn't hurt to appreciate those who love you,  remember love is not proud, love is not selfish and love knows no evil...❤❤❤❤ 

PHENOMENAL WOMAN

Botle Kayamba Tladi is  humble, a lover of life, a cover girl and a brand ambassador.  To many of us she Mpile as we affectionately know her, she and her twin sister have always being fearless and unapologetic when it came to how they carried themselves.  I have known them to be bubbly and loving,  As a career woman she continues to push boundaries and today we get to have a front row experience on who she is as an adult.  This is what she had to say:
Botle is a mom, wife, sister, daughter, cover girl for a fitness magazine and an adidas brand ambassador who believes in God.
Botle is a full time fitness trainer.
In your career your favourite project is myself, as I have grown so much over the years and every day I discover something new about myself that I never thought I had.  The other one is working with people( my clients) and seeing them transform right before my eyes, it so fulfilling and motivating it helps me to keep pushing as I realise that most of them draw inspiration from me.
As an achiever do you think that you have arrived?  Not quiet, I am still "a work in progress" As I would love to have my own gym, a fitness show and publish a first ever black owned fitness magazine.(*_*)
Success is a status of having achieved and accomplished something that I have been trying to do,  My success is also measured by my happiness and my state of mind in terms of what I think of myself
As wife and a mother I thank God everyday for blessing with such a loving and supportive husband because it gets hectic at times to strike a balance between my family and my career and in those moments my husband helps with house chores,  and I don't have to worry about anything else because he is behind me 100%.  I am forever grateful and I love him for that.
Your thoughts on patriarchy are that is still exists and it will take a long time before we can completely get rid of it as there are still women getting paid less salaries as compared to their male counterparts for the same position.
A legacy you would love to leave your son is for him to know that he can be everything he wants, I want him to know that his dreams are valid and he must never stop chasing after them,  I want him to be proud of himself and never give up.
Have you and your sister always had your lives figured out? ( Chuckles) It is by God's grace really.  We both have a fighting spirit and don't give up easily,  I thank God because we are each other's source of inspiration.
When the hustle and bustle of life gets too hectic I pray a lot and meditate on the word of God, I always refer back to what God says about me and my approach to life is always directed by his word.
I would like for everyone out there who is discouraged  to BELIEVE in themselves, find their CALLING/PURPOSE/TALENT and Use what you have.

 

👨👨👨BE THE KIND OF A MAN

To a lot of women that have been done dirty by men see men as pigs with penises, or trash, or scum or any other bad or disregarded thing you can think of.  To the entire world men are associated with power or respect,  i think being a men has nothing to do with gender or social status.  But to me being a man is knowing your worth and the worth of those around you, It is you protecting the the heritage to the word man.  I think being a man is a measure of your level of maturity.  It is said that most men will proclaim each their own goodness, but a just man who can find?.  He walks in integrity and his children are blessed after him.  To me being a man is you understanding that everything you do will eventually affect the out come or even the comfort of your children and ultimately their children.  A good man will never go around telling people how good he is as a man, but he will be a pillar of strength to those who are weak, a shoulder to lean on when times are tough. He is a giver not a taker, he is a protector not a tormentor, he is a sower of good seed.  He is a man who can't afford to have a bad reputation, a man who is unsettled by seeing the weak tormented,  he is strong yet gentle, he is firm yet so kind.  He is a man.

Be the kind of a man that every woman would want to have, the kind of a man every kid would want to call their father and a  kind of a man every man would look up to.  A kind that is just and righteous, A kind that walks in integrity...👨👨👨

❤❤❤COMMITMENT, IS IT HARD?

Since today is Monday,  And I am kinda missing my Man Crush Everyday.  I am playing around with the thought having to one day commit to the same person for a lifetime and well that scares the living lights out of me.  I am frightened by the thought of commitment and the funny part is that, commitment scares me not because i can't commit, but it is because i take commitment too seriously.   Seriously to a point that a stranger can walk up to me and to look after something as small as a bag and no matter how worn out the bag may seem, I would be frustrated by questions that would run through my mind, I would ask myself if i would be able to recognize the owner when they come back, or what if someone comes from nowhere and snatches the bag and i am unable catch them.  I would be worried by the responsibility of being entrusted with someones treasure long after the owner has thanked me and went on with their business.  To me commitment is putting the wellbeing of what you are committed to first and your needs last,  It is you always being conscious of the fact that you have taken an oath to be true and entirely invested in what you have committed yourself to. And other day my #MCE said he is for someone who is both mindful and emotional and in short he said someone who is an individual, someone who happy and complete on their own and yet sensitive and submissive to him as a man, someone who will allow him the space to be her protector and sanctuary.  As beautiful as that may sound, to someone who has learnt to fight and fend for themselves their whole lives its a task.  Having to rely on someone else emotionally and letting them be your source of strength will require a lot of getting used to.  So in a nutshell making a promise and sticking to it even if things change is key.  Respecting your commitment when it no longer makes sense to do so is also important, however my advise is that learn about whatever you plan on committing to and have a clear understanding of it. that will save you the trouble of staying in situations that are not happy or healthy all in the name of  respecting a promise you made out of an uninformed excitement...

Love truthful and commit wholeheartedly and life will treat you well❤❤❤ 

💋💋💋KISSING A SILENT WAY OF...

Kissing in many cultures and societies is seen and received in many different ways,  in my community it is regarded as a foreign act especially when people do it in public spaces.  And in my family, especially on my father's side it is how we show each other affection, if we are happy to see each or we haven't seen each other in a long time as that is often the case.  Yes we live too far apart and we hardly see each other and when we see each other we would give each other soft pecks on the lips and this is not reserved for any gender, but within the youth, we prefer to stick to hugging, imagine kissing that hot cousin, when you hardly have any hotties looking your way.  I guess my family is my biggest influence for being such a kisser.  I kiss my friends when I'm happy to see them,  I kiss children so much so that they end up believing that if a person doesn't want to kiss them its a sign that of anger or resentment.  Then the kissing in an intimate relationship, there my friend you have to have a special kind of a skill to keep me happy.  I mean I am a serial kisser and the lips, the lips have to be soft, juicy and succulent.  They have to have a certain colour to them a colour that says this is not just an act but it is an act of generosity, an act of kindness, a level to a sacred ritual, to me kissing doesn't just mean you are attracted to me, it means we share a spiritual bond,  It is a silent code we use to express words we don't know how to utter, a way we transfer messages to the heart without letting out words to me kissing is a qualifying criteria of how good you are as a lover.

Close your eyes, kiss slowly yet passionately, don't think about anything but the pleasure that you will find in the act you are engaged in...
 

IS JEALOUSY BRED BY UNCERTAINTY?

We call jealously by a lot of names and the most famous one is "The green eyed monster."  The saddest thing is jealous people are insane enough to be the most cruel people on earth.  We would say all sorts of things to and about jealous people.  However we are never aware of the breeding ground of their sudden odd behavior.  In my experience i have learnt that when we worry about not making any progress in life and our counterparts are equally in the same predicaments it is often easy to find comfort in the fact that we share common ground.  And then boom! the worst happens and those we thought are in our level move up in life and we realise that they never had our backs.  We actually learn the harsh reality that they never saw themselves as our equals,  yes they have always felt that they above us.  They have moved up because they hated being a part of our circle "The loozers."  They had a smart way of proving that to us by working on succeeding and coming back to share how stressful life is,  how hard hustling is,  but they never invited us when they decided to hustle and yes we hate them.  Yes we are not happy to see them and yes we find their stupid conversations annoying.  So before you judge a jealous person, stop for moment and consider the fact that they might not necessarily hate you or your success but they might hate the fact that they see you doing something about your life yet their lives are stuck in the same uncomfortable spot and it might hurt.

Be a little considerate when sharing you achievements and yes sometimes its better to vanish a little it make things less awkward.

❤❤❤❤

💕💕LOVE IS

I am sure by now, you have realized that love is the fuel that helps me to thrive.  To me love is knowing that there is someone out there who is afraid of making life changing mistakes because they are looking forward to the day they get meet me. love is doing good by people who under appreciate your efforts yet you still find it in your heart to do good by them.  love is being a support structure to a friend who fails to notice when you are hurt and never takes the time to ask you" how are you doing?"  Love is waking up happy because you made someone else smile the previous day.  love is you living your life knowing that there are innocent lives watching through cracked windows and shattered dreams looking at you as a reflection of hope. love is you being hurt so bad that you lie in your bed, your pillow soaked with tears from broken promises and a lump of painful goodbyes on your throat.  Yet when the morning arrives you are the first to wake up, look at your swollen face and say "its a new day."  let us go and change a life.  Love is you loving yourself enough to know that your pain is not worth your happiness and your tormentors are not worth the change in good manners.  Love is you loving yourself enough to walk away from spaces that make you forget who you once where.

Its a Wednesday, be wise and love yourself before you attempt to love anyone else

THE GIRL CODE

The other day i was talking to one my girls and as usual we would talk about a load of rubbish.  In the mist of the babbling we stumbled upon a very sensitive topic for some people which for me is kinda meaningless, most people feel that if a guy dates a friend and they happen to breakup its taboo for her friends to take interest in him, in other words he is forbidden fruit.  I think its absurd we already have a shortage in the male species not to mention the good and hot ones and now we have to add to the struggle by having senseless rules, i am the friend who will wish good for my friends but if a guy happens to like you and you don't love him back, what must happen to his love? let us return the love, it is wrong for love to come and go back to the sender void.  In a nutshell I'm saying it is pure evil and selfish for one not want someone and deny their friends the chance of receiving the love they felt they didn't need.  What if destiny has our names written in the stars?  What if he liked you as a childish crush?   And 20 years later you still feel you are entitled to that person?  I have a few words for you my friend " grow up."  I don't mean to insensitive but i strongly believe in fate and i believe that we are no longer people we once were in our teen years. Pre-destiny is often mysterious and sometimes that guy was brought to your lives for a reason. However loving you at that time was not the right thing and maybe the relationship would have destroyed both parties involved.  Let us change the girl code to the woman code and take note of the following.  Do not stick you nose in your friends business, stay away from your friends current partner and if the breakup was messy do not flaunt your friendship in your friends face.  Choose to be happy, worry less and let your spirit be free...

I am free to be me and I am free to love you and all your flaws

❤❤❤❤❤
 

Are you looking for me?

I am sitting here and my thoughts are wondering away to a place only my dreams can take me, a place far from the worries and cares of the world, a place his in the hills, a place shadowed by big trees, a place  so clear for me, i can recognize the color of the couch, it is a color that says don't be careless when you snuggle on top of me, but remember to be comfortable, the throw is safely draped across it, which gives it a fresh and yet warm look, the color of the walls are white, pure, loving and kind. This place is heavenly, it is where my heart wants to dwell for all eternity, it is where my love lives.  I can almost see him tucking his warm self near my cold feet, i can almost feel his warm, firm but yet loving hands taking my feet with the hope of making them warm, i can almost smell him, his scent it is manly and yet soft, i can almost feel the soft pecks of his lips on my forehead and his hand running through my hair, i can almost feel his warm breath across my neck.  He is saying something, something only my heart can hear, he is saying he never stopped looking for me, he points out to glass doors on his balcony and tells me of how often he would stand there looking at the passersby hoping i would look up and wave back at him.  He always wondered if i had been looking for him, little does he know.  I can almost hear him say " Stay here forever." I can almost, no I can hear him, I can't see him, he only lives in my dreams.  He is just a memory in my spirit and my mind knows him not...

❤❤❤

Love is a doing word

We often believe that love is when, those you love put you first, spend their last dime on you or don't hurt you.  But i think love is what you put out there,  today i saw a group of young boys and one of them just said to me " I love you too." 
My initial thought was that his grammar was just wrong and it hit me, we can go through life trying to correct silly mistakes others make trying to impress us or we can just receive what they giving.  I love young children i believe human beings are the smartest when they are young and the innocence is just too cute.  Those boys do not know me, they don't even know how i feel about them,  however they received that love and they gave it back to me.  It put a smile on my face and it did the same to them, we both won.

Give your best at all times and it will always come back to you.

love loves love❤❤❤❤❤ 

IS LIFE LOOSING ITS WORTH?

I am beside myself with worry and shock at how the value of life is quickly deterioting.  Just a few weeks ago a grown man was boasting about how lucky he was to have meterial wealth that a lot of us will only get to see in the magazines and on high end lifestyle tv shows, to his surprise later that day he had made a fatal blunder in the quest of showing everyone who cared to glance his direction how amusing life was for him,  i think for a second there he thought he had the keys to life itself in the pocket of his designer jeans and before he could realise that life was not determined by those who were privileged ti live it, he had sent two of his friends to early graves and unlike him they had not had the chance to live long enough to be able to can afford the life he had.

As we came to terms with that unfortunate ordeal we learned of another fatal blunder that claimed a life of an innocent pedesrian who was on her way home from work.  I am calling this accidents blunders because they could have been avoided.  This one is more painful because these motorists were racing on a busy road and their ignorance claimed someone's life in the most gruesome manner, as the deceased was cut into limbs due to being hit by that car and to make matters worse the perpetrator fled the seen, how cold have we gone as human beings that one can commit such an aweful thing and only care about himself going to jail?

And the last one that sent me to a young coma only in my spirit though, was the knowledge that a newborn infant was dumped at a dumping site.  This act of evil doing happened five minutes from where I stay.  What mother does that? What kind of woman carries a child for months and then decides to dump them in a bag?  I think we as the human race are so caught up in achieving comfortable lives that we have forgotten that a true legacy one can live behind is a legacy that the generation to come will feel the need to carry forward. The human race has become so individual based that people only care about their own gratification not even stopping for a moment tho check who gets hurt in the process,  we have become so self centred that we no longer even know what the term loved ones mean.  My challenge to everyone who will read this piece is that you look around you and have a sense of community, look around and fix that which is within your reach.  I say we cannot afford to loose the core of life to self satisfaction.  After all life is meant meant to be generational.

❤❤❤