LOVE IS THE FUEL TO KEEP GOING

Have you realized how we have things planned out when it comes to love? To everyone who is in love or the pursuit thereof, everything is cut and dry, you meet the perfect person, you love them with all of your heart, they love you back and you live happily ever after.  However that is not always the case the people we love the most tend not understand or see how much we love them, you may love a person will all your might and go out of your way to make sure they know it but find out they think you are pathetic, desperate and obsessed, what we fail to understand when we are in love is that every person has his or her way of interpreting love and they also know how they want to be loved, sometimes you may love people so bad that your love for them drives them away. In such instances we happen to find our faults and work tirelessly to grow from them and become better people, but if you are improving yourself for the same person who left you because your love for them was doing more harm than good, chances are you are in for an epic fail because it's not about how you have grown as a lover but to them it will always be about your love for them, remember that while you were working on yourself they were also living their lives and they are also not the same people they used to be, on the other hand to them you are still the same person especially because you never moved on, the fact that you are a better man or woman is a sure sign that you are worse than you were  before and therefore a danger to them, in other words what they see when they look at you they see a ticking time bomb.  It is a good thing to love the same person, it shows consistency in your personality and it also proves that you know what you want, but be careful not to love people beyond your own existence, love goes both ways, be woke enough to understand that how great people are does not mean they are open to everything.  Love often finds us when we're not looking because love is effortless and true.

Love yourself enough to wait for love that will love you the same way you love, it is greater if it's not taught...

LOVE IS THE FUEL TO KEEP GOING

Have you realized how we have things planned out when it comes to love? To everyone who is in love or the pursuit thereof, everything is cut and dry, you meet the perfect person, you love them with all of your heart, they love you back and you live happily ever after.  However that is not always the case the people we love the most tend not understand or see how much we love them, you may love a person will all your might and go out of your way to make sure they know it but find out they think you are pathetic, desperate and obsessed, what we fail to understand when we are in love is that every person has his or her way of interpreting love and they also know how they want to be loved, sometimes you may love people so bad that your love for them drives them away. In such instances we happen to find our faults and work tirelessly to grow from them and become better people, but if you are improving yourself for the same person who left you because your love for them was doing more harm than good, chances are you are in for an epic fail because it's not about how you have grown as a lover but to them it will always be about your love for them, remember that while you were working on yourself they were also living their lives and they are also not the same people they used to be, on the other hand to them you are still the same person especially because you never moved on, the fact that you are a better man or woman is a sure sign that you are worse than you were  before and therefore a danger to them, in other words what they see when they look at you they see a ticking time bomb.  It is a good thing to love the same person, it shows consistency in your personality and it also proves that you know what you want, but be careful not to love people beyond your own existence, love goes both ways, be woke enough to understand that how great people are does not mean they are open to everything.  Love often finds us when we're not looking because love is effortless and true.

Love yourself enough to wait for love that will love you the same way you love, it is greater if it's not taught...

MY ALTER EGO WOULD BE FUN AND...

This summer I would like to have an alter ego, does anyone know where I can buy one, but then again I don't think I'd be able to afford one, my bank balance is financially impaired.  I don't know if I'm having a mid-life crisis or I'm getting too comfortable with life that I'm beginning to believe boundaries do not apply to me?  all I know is that there is this person who is kind, thoughtful and committed to being a role model and within that person there's another one who is unapologetic about her perceptions and doesn't hesitate to put people in their place.  The issue here is that my good side over shadows my bad and wild one.  my alter ego will be everything I can't afford to become or rather not bold enough to be.  My alter ego would shamelessly put insensitive people in their people without paying mind to their emotions, not being afraid to say it when I think people's ideas suck, my alter ego would be able to initiate friendships and relationships with no effort, my alter ego would start topics that are considered taboo on social platforms who knows maybe even be a phone actress if you know what I mean, my alter ego would be shellfish with their time and be able to say no! more, my alter ego won't mind picking fights on social media just for the fun of it. It would....uhm

I think this alter ego thing should remain an idea, I might end up being a criminal just for the thrill of the possibility of getting caught.

It's the end of the year, let's celebrate it by doing things our normal selves would never dream of, as long as they are not done at other people's expense.

A LOVE LETTER TO MY SECRET LOVER

I woke up this morning wondering if you are okay, my heart sank as i realized that i was not there to kiss you good morning,  oh how i wish i was there by your side when you woke up this, i missed the soft grey fur throw that is always carefully spread across your bed, i don't know if it is the one that keeps me warm or the thrill i get each time i'm i remember that you are nothing but an illusion.  My greatest memories of being there are those of me waking up to an empty bed and beaming with joy knowing that you are downstairs preparing breakfast, the fresh smell of coffee making me count the steps of your feet on the wooden staircase as you lazily make your way up.  I smile because i know you are going to walk softly once inside your bedroom just so you don't startle me, i'm fascinated by the fact that you know that i hate surprises and you hate it when i'm grumpy.  I smile because i know its going to be a great day, yeah a great day because i saw my love, a perfect day because my love was the last thing i saw last night and today i am waking up to his pearly white smile and the softness of his eyes make mine teary.  I cry because my love for is secret.  I cry because no he is not there, he doesn't exist, he is a perfect but blurry illusion that exists only in my head. his love is real, his voice is true,but his touch is not mine...

Love is true, love pure and love lives inside each and everyone of us, love is what we make it out to be.  If you give love the universe will surely bring love back to you a hundred fold.❤❤❤

WHEN WE WERE STILL NAIVE

Her strokes were sceptic

It found out that he liked me and it drew closer so it could find out what is it that I had that made me a better person than it was.  I loved clothes, yes I was fashion crazed, unfortunately for me my dad who believed people could wear anything they wanted only if they could afford to pay for them.  And I had a friend who came from a completely different family she had the latest fashion items and always had the trendiest hairstyles.  I wanted someone who had shared the same views on fashion and how clothes defined identity. My demon filled that gap, we had a lot of things in common and we almost had the same aspirations and well I had a better chance of achieving them because my parents believed in education and for them it was the best gift any parent would give to their children.  It was my DEMON and I loved it, embraced it and took care of it, I gave up a lot of things for it only for it to go please others with them.  It slowly unpacked who aspired to be, and if I had something it secretly wished for, it would make sure didn't enjoy that privilege.  Why did I continue to be with demon? I was naive and young and the sad truth about me is that I hold on to the good about bad people and well I have these urge to help strays, I love mothering way too much that I would break my back trying to save someone who didn't even need saving.  On one fateful day I went to let my DEMON know that I had being offered a post in a well-known bank, it was the something I always wanted and I was over the moon and I had to share with someone who understood that, I saw the green in its eyes, It demanded to know when had I applied for that position and how did I find out that they were hiring, I didn't know if those are the questions we ask people we are happy for?  but I would never congratulate anyone in that manner. Since then she has shown me more than once that she has always been my rival and that every time she has cheered me on was just so steer me in the wrong direction and to set me up for failure. Yes she stroked me each time I was down but it was only to infect my wounds and make sure I never had another shot at getting up.  it took me time to realise that I have dreams that I had put on hold, I developed a fear for going after what I wanted despite having carefully planned strategies to see them through and heaps of years of wasted ideas and dead end ventures. Do I blame her?  No, I am happy she came into my life and I am happy she revealed her true colours and I am happy that she made me realize that snakes won't change and not everyone deserves our pity.

Lesson learned : Have your own future figured out, stay true to your self and change your situation around without taking advice from people who don't know where they are headed. 

#Woza2019

IT'S SUMMER LET'S COME OUT AND PLAY

Summer my most favourite time of the year, I still get the same fuzziness I've always had as a little girl, the excitement of buying new clothes, the warm summery colours, families going to town for their holiday shopping and bright beautiful flowers everywhere.

THE FLOWER TREND

The feeling of soft cotton and flowing down my body is the best feeling.  Since this is the time best time for food markets. I figured it's the best time to be playful and simple, and who said girls can't be beautiful and playful at the same? since food markets have open plan settings and with food stalls all over the place, staying comfortable is a necessity and best to be comfortable and trendy this summer is to team up florals with great sneakers or pointy flats and flip flop are also big at the moment.  Here is a little inspiration from me to you...

Have fun, find love, give love and unapologetically you, have a great weekend.

REMOVING SOME CLUTTER FROM MY LIFE

A NECESSARY SPRING CLEANING

As the year is drawing to an end, i figured i should sit back and do some self introspection and i realized that i needed to detach myself from a lot of things.  It is easy for one to change themselves or adapt to certain situations in the name of building relationships and what one fails to see is that each time you change yourself for someone else your soul slowly fades away and before you know it you have zero identity.  And you find yourself hoping from space to space trying to fit in.  In the past i held a position in a bank that required me to change my image, the business's corporate wardrobe required one to look a certain way and that way for me was superficial, but because i was happy about this opportunity that had fell on my lap the change did not seem like a drastic measure and before i knew it i was turning into someone i didn't even recognize, a very unhappy woman who was also too compromising.  I resigned and went on a quest to start my own company which did not work out.  However in all of this i found out that i was on a journey of rediscovery, i was no longer afraid to call out people who were out of line, and i was unapologetic about my decisions.  But lately i realized that i have to sit back and recheck who is riding with me and no longer welcome.

The bitter friend :  I have a friend who has the most terrible temper and i find that each time i spend time with her i feel like my soul has been to a very cold, empty and God forsaken place and she has to go.

The gossip monger : This friend is always looking out for other people's weakest moments and what he/she does not realize is that people are moving further into greatness and she is stuck, she is also going.

Procrastination : This is all me, I have the best ideas and clear ways of how to implement them, but i postpone until they no longer seem relevant, I promise that i am slowly moving away from this behavior. 

Jealous people : They are quiet an active bunch, who have a talent for breaking down good things done by others and this spirit has to stay in 2018 we don't need it in the next year.

The selfish friend : This wonderful person has been there for me in my worst days and they have had a good impact on me i won't deny it, but the new me is a big hearted, purpose driven and sharing person, they don't have a space in my life now because everything has to about them 

The leader who lacks a backbone : In 2019 if you consider yourself a leader you must have a backbone, we can't be lead by spineless people, how will you lead us if you can't stand up straight?

To move forward and be great at what you do, one needs to be very firm about who gets to stay in their lives and other traits are good in the teenage phase but bad for matured people, BE BOLD, BE BRAVE, BE AWESOME!!!

SUMMER RAIN'S LOVE AND BETRAYAL

HIS EYES AND MASCULINITY MADE ME TO IT

I knew what his love meant to her, I knew how she longed to be his.  She loved him enough to believe that his love belonged to no other but her, she used to be my friend she used to be the most important thing in my life and I once cheered for her to give him a chance and I for a long e believed they were meant to be together.  Now all that has changed, all of that changed on that hot summer day, he was in the local play field watching soccer and as I approached he started walking towards me, what could this mean could it be the universe setting us up or were our bodies responding to the lusts we were secretly harbouring towards each other?  As he was walking it started raining I stood there soaking in the rain. As he got closer he looked at me and looked down and as he look up again I caught his gaze and I was sold.  His eyes ignited a fire I was not intending on putting off and I wanted him to hold me in his arms, I wanted to taste his his lips and I wanted to feel my head against his strong chest. His scent, his masculinity and the rain, the cooling summer rain were enough for me to want to dance in the rain and forget that he meant everything to someone else. To me he was my summer fling, I lusted after his power and maybe he was a just weakness.  I recognized something about myself through him. All of this I'll never know, but he's was worth the loss and he is a sin I'll never regret, he is my summer love.

This is the time to live out our fantasies, to laugh uncontrollably and to live life without thinking about the consequences. Come out and let's dance in the rain...

Weisenhof Coffee Shop and Restaurant

I needed a lovely and quiet setting to recoup a day after black Friday.  As you may have realised I have a thing for tranquil gardens, and good food. The biggest highlight for me when it comes to this place is the leafy garden and a chirping little birdie here and there and well their choice of music, for me nothing beats enjoying a great meal listen to good music.  Sitting here I can't help but start day dreaming about having my own little family and driving out here every Saturday for some hearty and tasty breakfast, the place is kids friendly with a secured and user friendly kiddies play area, you can enjoy your cup of tea while watching your pride and joy having a time of their life and if unlike me you are not a dreamer and outdoors person like me. Their dining hall is just as great, wooden finished suitable for a traditional boer vibes. The staff is warm and friendly and the manager sees to it that your stay at the place is comfortable he keeps checking up on you without imposing and making you feel uneasy, because Heidelberg is a traditional small dorpie, the people who frequent the restaurant are mostly white, however you will never feel unwanted or awkward there's no barriers or gaps experienced when one is enjoying their meal.  I still maintain that Afrikaaners know their meat and they kill it, for anyone who'd like to visit Heidelberg they must make sure that they add weisenhof to their wishlist...


For a relaxed and healing experience, not to mention traditionally prepared pork spare ribs weisenhof coffee shop and restaurant is the place to go...

BROKEN DREAMS

A NORMAL DAY FOR PRIMARY SCHOOL PUPILS

I watched in total shock and disbelief as children as young as 12 years old pin each other down and strangle each other, hurling insults i could never dare to utter even if i were drunk.  It took me back to years when i was their age, a time of blissful ignorance and total oblivion to the ills of the world.  A time when children where children and adults knew their place, in those days the same school was a place of highest discipline, a place where conduct was the order of the day. In those days you could never wear the navy and powder blue uniform and think you could behave anyway you pleased.  We were often reminded that we had the same colours as the SAPS and we had to behave like people who were upholding the law.  I remember how we would be blessed with beatings for not telling on those who didn't pay mind to their books after classes and then struggle at school, no child in our school would fight wearing school uniform and get away with their actions, every crime was brought to book.  What happened to our beloved school?  It died, yes it died with the then school head Mr Moletsane.  A man who taught us that one never stops learning, a man who called us lions because we were royalty, he took all the good we had with when he went to the grave.  Now the current pupils are left with broken dreams as they embark on a journey of the unknown. they are walking their path blindly without any guidance, they are the future that is allowed to fight, cuss and bully each other. they stab each other instead of encourage each other.  Their teachers are afraid of them as they watch them teach others how the engage in sexual activities. how does a grade 1 pupil teach his fellow school companion such?  A grade 4 pupil robs his classmates off  their clothes and is not even shy to tell that he doesn't have anything to wear and he gets cold.  After being confronted by a concerned parent he tells them that his mom will stab them to death.  What is the Vaal triangle turning into?  How do we restore these broken dreams and promises we were given after 1994?  who do we blame? All we have are questions we cannot answer, all we have are broken dreams.

Children are our future lets us protect and encourage them to be better leaders.

A Passage Of Becoming

I have always being fearless, however my fearlessness has always been misguided, I remember I have always being disgruntled by seeing other people being unhappy or oppressed, for me people didn't have flaws and therefore they didn't deserve punishment. As I got to understand the law of life It became clear that I was custodian to the well-being of those that didn't have a voice, but the fear of operating in that realm made me a rebellious. I rebelled against my reality and purpose, I never feared death and anything that had of destroying me and for me to learn certain lessons I walked on paths I knew led to destruction the darker the path the more I wanted to explore.  It took one extreme experience, it was not harsh nor was it traumatic but I think my angel had had it with my ways. It was meant to be a perfect,  fun and meaningless night, but everything went wrong. I was invited to Tsogo Sun- garden court in Morningside for a steamy rendezvous, a night of blissful ignorance, my date went through the trouble of making sure it was a night to remember he called a cab for me, went to meet me by the hotel entrance, ordered room service and  breakfast specifically prepared for me. But I couldn't fully enjoy myself, it was like my inner being was deliberately letting me down, I kept asking myself if dragging other people into my mess was the answer?, was self destructing the easiest way out?, was existing better than living? Laying between those white sheets took me to a place whereby my purpose was confronted, I left Sandton a few notes richer, but my spirit was cast down, it took to me that night to walk a path unknown to anyone but my soul, the darkest place I've ever been, running away was no longer an option. With every step I am brought closer to myself and each day my purpose gets clearer and greater. I am well on my way to becoming who I was born to be. I am on a path that has never being walked before, a journey of becoming.

To live a life of purpose means, letting go of a lot of comforts and loosing a lot of friendships, however the joy and fulfilment are the priceless promises no one can ever take away from you.

I AM THAT I AM

I AM...

I am what I was created to be, I am not my eyes nor am I my lips, I am not my body nor am I my legs, I am not an object of anybody's desire, nor am I what you want me to be, I am my purpose, I am a contributor to the promise of tomorrow.  I am a carrier of a hope and a reflection of greatness. I am unapologetically proud of all that I carry and how I carry myself.  If you feel that I am inappropriate I'm my approach them maybe you should look the other way when I'm facing your way. I am here to walk my path, reach out to those I was called for.  I am woman, I am my truth and I will fight for it until you accept that my path is mine and my looks have nothing to do with it. I am Nthabiseng and I am here for change and change I will bring.

Happy Friday, love, make love and show love...

WAYS TO KEEP A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP

Relationship are fun

We tend to believe that relationships were meant to bring torment and heart break, however that is far from the truth, relationships are meant to groom us into better human beings. But it takes a special kind of a mindset to understand that it takes effort to cultivate a healthy and happy relationship.  There are characteristics to a happy relationship and those characteristics are:

Love : One must not be in any kind of a relationship with people they don't love, it is and will always be a recipe for disaster.

Honesty :  Be honest to another in all your actions and decisions.

Transparency : Being transparent about the reasons you are both in a relationship and lay out all your expectations and intentions will yield best results.

Perseverance : Carry each other's burdens, and bear with one another when things are tough and help find a way out.

Understanding : Being able to reach a level of understanding whereby one is able to accept the fact that we all come from different backgrounds and therefore what matters to you might senseless to you, but understanding will help maintain mutual respect.

Compromise : I still maintain that for a relationship to thrive there is always a party that has to compromise more than the other, others call them tops and a bottoms and a bottom will always take the last preference, my take is if the relationship is worth it then why not?

Compassion : Have compassion for your partner, be their first port of call and let them know that you have their back.

Communication : Communication is the most important characteristic of a healthy relationship, if you are able to talk about what you don't like or what you expect will make it easy for your partner to avoid hurting you and they will also be able to let you know if they are failing to meet any of your expectations and you can also do likewise.

Affection : Affection is the most practical way to forging a bond in a relationship and once that bond is secured, no distance formed against your relationship shall prosper.

Intimacy : Once one can master the art of intimacy, great sex will come naturally and there won't be an urge for one to cheat or find other alternatives to a one sided source of satisfaction.

Respect : Respect is a foundation to a strong, stable and healthy relationship, with respect one can master all these other traits effortlessly.

Guard your heart with all diligence, out of it flows the issues of life...

LIVING TO PLEASE OTHERS

WE ARE CONDITIONED TO COMFORMED AS AN ACT OF LOVE

I read a facebook post earlier on and i was moved by the truth it carried,  This pastor was saying something about how our societies are conditioning us by instilling fear so that we may think that we are inadequate.  This has being my truth for the longest time, I remember how my father was terrified by the idea of me having to start working as soon as left college.  He was convinced that me going into that world at a young age would put me at risk of being exploited and forced to go beyond what my job spec entailed.  this made me angry as i felt he had little faith in me and was wasting my time, but to my surprise i went into the corporate space being conditioned to those teachings and the worst part was the fact that i was now too desperate and i could wait to make my own money and that meant settling for anything that came my way.  It was my reality, I wasn't born to be rich and i was not alllowed to contest any mistreatment coming from the people who gave me a shot i didn't deserve and the more time i spend in any job the less exited i became.  My destiny was calling, i was troubled and had no peace in my soul.  And in the mist of being called by destiny, reality was there to remind me that i couldn't be anything greater than being better at my job as much, as i was good at my job, and as much i would always exeeded the expectations of my employers.  I knew in my head that i could do extremely well in anything i put my mind to but in reality i was held back by fear, the fear of failure, the fear of rejection and a fear of having to go further than my thoughts could ever wonder, the fear of being extra ordinary and having to be responsible of other people.  Life always had a way of throwing me into the deep end and i would often find myself in the first line of report seat and having to take the business forward, however i would remind myself that i am not adequate enough and no matter how much of my brilliance i could offer i was never be enough to pitch that great idea and see it come into life, my father loved me way too much that he couldn't bear to see me hurt or being disappointed, therefore he taught me fear and fear loved me enough to keep me from soaring.  Truth is destiny over powered fear and i lived a life of turmoil whereby i was contantly restless as a battle continued to get mightier within me.  And now?  Now I am unable to hold it in, now i am ready to see what this explosion is taking me,  I don't know much, all i know i am willing to go anywhere my thoughts take me and if it means i have to burn some bridges that's a risk i am willing to take.

FOR SOME PEACEFUL SERENITY

WHY THE FNB CONFERENCE & LEARNING CENTER

The FNB conference center is centrally situated in the Sandton business district and it is surrounded by major shopping and entertainment complexes.  the center has tranquil gardens that create a relaxed setting for your guaranteed peace of mind.

FOOD AND BEVERAGE

The food and beverage team is both creative and professional, they have buffet breakfast. lunch and dinner.  my favorite being the breakfast buffet as the their warm and welcoming chefs are always there to attend to the guests specific needs, with a large variety of food to choose from you will never feel like you are a visitor,  the staff is warm and friendly.  The meals are well presented with every detail taken in to consideration.  The guests are also able to advise if they have special dietary requirements like Halaal or Kosher,  the request has to be made at least 48 hours in advance. 

En-suite Rooms

their rooms are spacious, fully carpeted and air conditioned offering a relaxed and homely feel, they are so cosy one to would want to snuggle up all day in bed.  The perfect setting for a good book and great wine,  with a variety of good beverages to give comfort when having late nights.  I loved the lighting, perfect for those beautiful selfies.

Facilities 

The center has a lot of facilities, they can host different events from small intimate cocktails to large corporate functions,  with 17 versatile conference venues, 3 boardrooms and a 140 seater auditorium, A swimming pool, tennis and volley ball court to get that adrenaline pumping, a place you can be rest assured that you will never find me,  their fully licenced bar operates from 12:00 PM and from 16:00 PM on Sundays, they also have wireless internet available throughout the center.

I thoroughly enjoyed being here each time i have had the opportunity to visit and it forever will remain my favorite spot especially in the moments i need to re-boot.

The astounding Terry Pheto

Terry Pheto

Amazing doesn't even begin to describe her.  Born and bred in the vaal triangle Terry is proof that the vaal is a force to be reckoned with especially when it comes to talent. From multiple award winner to cover girl, entrepreneur and actress Terry Pheto radiates so much beauty and serenity.  To a lot of people she is a role model and to many she a beacon of hope.  She was born in Sebokeng but never for a single moment did she allow the mentality of where she comes from determine her future and she keeps on raising the bar without drawing bad publicity to her name. Terry Loves chocolates and Sales. She is truly A vaaly And She keeps on flying the Vaal Flag up high.

CHEERS TO THE FESTIVE SEASON

💝💝💝A BEAUTIFUL BEGINNING TO AN END OF A BEAUTIFUL YEAR

Waking up in the morning my good morning greetings are served by the chirping bird, the bustle of  morning commuters on their way to work.  The atmosphere is filled with warmth and the air is filled with echoes of the approaching festivities.  And one can't help the exitement of what this coming festive season has to offer.  and to kick of the festive we will be celebrating quiet a reasonable number of game changers who hail from the vaal traingle and have little snippets and young memoirs of what the year has brought forth for them.  We will also be checking out a few events and hot spots that are worth a visit, It is going to be a fun filled adventureous journey with lots of love and laughter.  I can't wait and i hope you are going to join me as i embark on a beautiful journey to 2019

I feel like wearing a floral dress and walk bare foot in hot sand,  good bye spring and hello summer
💝💝💝

IT TAKES SELF RESPECT TO DO THE RIGHT THING

Self respect is when one takes themselves seriously enough to respect other people, people who have no respect waste other people's time and are an insult to one's efforts.  I'm at the community library now and the little squabbles people are having here are so unnecessary, i mean who in their right state of mind or is there any self respecting human being that will have an argument on who is next in line to access the internet?  I was having a conversation earlier on with a friend or should i say my muse?.  We were talking about how grown ups feel that their age qualifies them to treat people in which ever way they choose.   And here we are we find ourselves around people with zero home grooming, probably raised by the same kind of parents we were talking about earlier.  If you have some amount of respect within yourself you would never in your entire existence be of any inconvenience to another person, especially if you don't know that particular person,  you would never place yourself before their needs.  Self respect is seen by how you carry yourself in public, it doesn't matter if are going through a rough patch and you are trying to make things happen for yourself, we can't be having the same conversation over things you know.  I myself hate rules but you will never see me disregarding rules if i know my actions will cause discomfort to the next person.  if and when you know that you are going to into a public space, take some time to groom yourself and make sure you look presentable, be sure to think before you talk,  you might be talking to your potential employer or potential client.  Treat people how you like them to treat you, have tact in your speech not all of us where raised by savages and most of all be polite and respectful.

It does not cost a thing to be nice and it certainly gains you a lot of respect and love,  who doesn't want to be loved?  Self respect will take you places you never dreamt about and it is not that hard try it, it works

WOMEN CHEAT BECAUSE

WHY DO WOMEN CHEAT?

I have seen women who are with really good men cheating on their partners and every time this happens I am left with a lot of questions.  One tends to believe that being with a caring and wonderful person who takes good care of your needs should be enough, but what we never ask ourselves is what does being taken care of mean? There are a few reasons I have noticed from people I've seen cheating on their supposedly good men. Some women cheat because they grew up in disadvantaged homes and swore that once they got a chance to get out of those situations they would never go back.  And when this woman who has always despised where she comes from meets a well off man who adores her and gives her the life she has always dreamed of, in most cases a woman who finds herself in such a predicament would decide that even if the love is not there she has all she needs and besides who says love pays the bills? And even though she can be able to be faithful to her man, over time the heart will want what it wants and she will cheat.
The second reason is that a lot of women are not able to voice out their sexual fantasies. The 21st century has unlocked a lot and one of them being that the modern woman now understands that sex should be enjoyable for both parties involved and since society has taught a lot of us that a good girl can't behave like a s@#*, an unsatisfied modern woman who is afraid that her partner might question the source of her fantasies can find cheating as a harmless and easy way to keep the peace in her relationship while her sexual needs are met.

Other women cheat because they are unable to manage a healthy balance in their lives. The modern woman continues to make strides in the corporate world and with some holding the highest positions in the biggest corporates, most of them forget to leave their positions statuses at the Office and well we all know that a lot of men can't tolerate being treated like subordinates by their significant other, In such situations this woman would go for a side nigga who won't mind being dominated in exchange of financial privileges therefore she gets to have her bread buttered on both sides.

Genuine love is hard to come by, make sure you date within the correct class and you are honest about what you are about from day one and if he/she is not what you want let them go and save yourself and that person time.

MEN ARE GOALS

Men are... To me a man is a protector, a leader and a sower, a man according to creation is the manager of all humanity and creation, therefore that makes him a protector or custodian to all the wealth the earth has to provide. According to nature he names what he wants for his family, he decides the kind of life his children will have, he determines the future of his children and creates a legacy for them, therefore that makes him a leader.  Out of a seed of a man a nation arises and his name lives on, Out of his seed a heritage is preserved and the legacy of his offspring shall
forever remain, therefore a man is a sower. Men are kings, all we as women have to do is learn to recognize those who know who they are and run from those who don't.  A man who understands his truth will know how to treat those around him and a man who knows that he is a king will recognize his queen because only she can help him fulfil his destiny...

A shout out to all the kings who will not mind to let go of their empires if it means they get to keep their queens and to all the queens who will stick by their kings and make sure the empire is safe...

FUN IS

💋💋💋IS FUN REALLY ABOUT HEAVY DRINKING?

Since it's Friday and most of us can't wait for the weekend to begin,  I am sitting here wondering if the weekend is about going out, drinking and sex binging?.  if one can just take the time to walk around one would realise that some people have already drank themselves silly.  This took me to the time I used to work in Vereeniging, you'd get into a taxi on your way home and be met with the shame of some ladies your mothers age hooking up with men they have never met before,  there was a time during the festive season that two women in their late 50's got into a taxi drunk and loud and as they were busy recalling their activities earlier in that day a man about their age and equally drunk stumbled in to the taxi, to my shock one of the drunk ladies asked were he was because they could see that he had a great time and they were disappointed by the fact that they had not seen each other earlier, seeing that they were in the same drinking spot.  When the time came for these ladies to jump off the taxi they persuaded their newly found drinking buddy to come with.  By that time my mind was racing to this man's home as he had received his wages and now these leeching oldies were about to suck him dry, I could only imagine the shock and disappointment for his children and wife when he got home empty pocketed and probably mugged simply because he couldn't say No!!!.  But my biggest issue was the fact that these type of women who go to that particular spot were famous for initiating sex with these unsuspecting men in the quest to infect them with all kinds of infections including the HI virus.  People tend to make terrible and stupid choices all in the name of fun and once the time comes for them to deal with the consequences, they choose to shy away from being accountable, yes they choose to avenge themselves and a hard pillow to swallow is the fact that in many of the cases the ones that get hurt are often innocent and clueless of the hurt these perpetrators have gone through.
To anyone who is planning on going out tonight or any other night please think long and hard about the reason why you will be going out.  If its about socialising, enjoying good music, great food, good company, some good ambiance then go for it.  However if it is for drinking yourself into a stupor or having unprotected sex with strangers then don't even bother. Just hire yourself a few movies,  order some good pizza, buy your favourite beer and stay indoors.

It Friday lets take some time to take care of ourselves, recover from the week's madness and have some down time.  See you on the flip side... ciao

LIFE IS NO LONGER WHAT IS USED TO BE

Life has proved to be getting harder generation after generation. Which took me back to a time where this time of the year was a time we would be exited by little things like buying new clothes for Christmas and the first Sunday of the year, having the best and tastiest delicacies and looking forward to the school day for the year. I remember how we would wake up in the morning with so much zeal and happiness because going to New grade meant a step closer to being all grown and independent, yes the best and biggest dream we all had were about being able to afford anything and everything we wanted.

I was watching a series just now and someone said it was ironic that grown-ups spend all their time thinking about the past, while children spend their time thinking about the future. That got me thinking, is this how life is supposed to be? Are we meant to dream about a future we would later not want to live in? I don't think that's the true intention of life, I believe life is meant to be lived as it comes, I believe we have to be taught from a young age that the present is all life has to offer because the future is never guaranteed.

Live a meaningful and full life, give life your best shot. If you give life your best and don't live recklessly, your future is guaranteed whether you make it to your future or not.  But waking up day in and day out waiting for the future to start living is the most painful thing one can ever do to themselves, let us not think about life, let us live life. If we are respectful and considerate, believe me, the past and the future will definitely sort themselves out.

The sun is out and the summer body is loading.... I think this is a great time to enjoy the outside and get those cameras snapping

I'M IN LOVE WITH

❤❤❤I'M IN LOVE

Seems like we have invented new ideas about love or being in love.  The modern day meaning to being in love is being with a person who is able to buy you all the gifts money can buy or being able to fly to the most expensive shopping destinations and baecations.  In simple terms comforming to the standards of the words"the deeper the pockets the greater the love".  Someone recently said they would handle being beaten up in a relationship if it meant they would have the priviledge of being with a money'd man.  We live in an era where a man who buys you the latest spots car and the longest expensive waeves #touchmybumlength and turns and beats you into a pulp is  named a decent guy and the most gentle of them all.
For me being love is being with a person who motivates me to be an achiever and better person holistically, not having to feel insecure because i am constantly being told that i can't be ambitious, because my man or "sponsor" doesn't want an ambitious woman.  I'm in love with the idea of being called a QUEEN simply because no other name would be fit for me.  I'm in love with the thought of having someone working himself to the bone to keep to the promises he has made.  Yes i'm in love with letting someone to be comfortable to be around me, i'm in love with the thought of seeing them pushing towards being the best man.  To me being in love is not being able to wait to talk to that special someone,  Not being bothered by anything because you know there is someone who has your back, being in love to me is having someone walk with you through your best and hold you through your weakest.  Being in love is being with someone who will stand by you through your worst and love you through your everything. 

I'm in love with the thought of being able to be all that to someone else and allowing them to be all that for.  I'm in love with my KING ❤❤❤❤

💔💔💔MONDAY MORNING

Dear Monday morning do you always have to be this brutal?.  Why do you really have to be this inconsiderate?. I believe you did realise that the weekend was way too hectic for a lot of us, and yet you were cruel enough to come knocking at our doors, you could see that I was restless throughout the night and yet you let the cares of the world trouble me in the little time that i managed to sleep peacefully.  Monday morning I knew you were coming.  Yes I was expecting you,  I know you Monday morning and I know you never miss an appointment.  Yes i know that you keep to your promises and yes I do understand that you do not skip on your commitments.  I love you Monday and I respect your tenacity.  Yes I respect your honesty and how unapologetic you are about your presence.  You don't care if we partied too hard the previous weekend or if we were too busy to remember that you will be here and how you'll throw your weight around.  Monday morning i know you are always waiting to steal our blissful oblivion away from us and yes I have grown to realise that Sunday is too afraid of you that she can't wait to go.  Yes Sunday doesn't want to feel your harsh presence.   Monday morning I don't ask much from you,  however can you be a little understanding?. Can you show us some courtesy?.  I don't want to believe that you are comfortable with people and other days seeing you as a tyrant.  Monday morning my humble plea to you is that you come a little late.  I plead with you my beloved Monday Morning, will you please arrive at 80:00,  I for one would really appreciate it and i also believe that my fellow human inhabitants would also love you for it.

I hope to hear from you soon💋💋💋

Love and respect
Nthabiseng

If shoes where men, I'd be a whore

I love shoes, I have a special kind of a relationship with shoes, especially when they are bright coloured.  To me the type of a shoe one is wearing completes their entire outfit, you can dress to the nines and wear an ugly shoe or just a bad coloured shoe, that for me is the most disrespectful mistake that can mess up your whole outfit.

Is it an affair?

I walk into my favourite shoe store Joey & Sam, just by merely glancing through the doorway, all kinds of emotions rush through my entire body from the way the shoes are placed to the colours, the kinds and the designs.  I grab one shoe and hold it like a new born baby, my eyes so soft and my heart full of love and embrace, I feel bad yeah I feel real bad because I know I'm about to cheat, I'm about to cheat with another shoe. My attention is about to be stolen by another equally enticing beauty and in the period I'll spend at the store, I would be tempted to lick some of the shoes.  Some of them make me want to sing" Baby let me love you."  If Morris Chestnut was to walk past and wave at me I wouldn't even notice. The kind of focus I put in a relationship is the same kind I put when I'm around shoes, no outside force can distract me. And I always leave Joey and Sam fulfilled and I having feelings of possible multiple orgasms running through my entire body.  Yeah my love affair with shoes is all rounded.  It is a spiritual and emotional state of being, shoes make me happy, shoes are my biggest motivation and yes shoes are my first love...

Wear good shoes and walk like royalty. It's a Friday be fabulous be fashionable...

❤❤❤RELATIONSHIPS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO HURT

Relationships are supposed to be enjoyable.  Yes from time to time things won't go our way and that can lead to disagreements or even altercations , but that does not mean a relationship should remain a bed of thorns.  But what is it that forces us to settle for abusive relationships?  Over the years i have realized that a lot of people tend to idolize their partners way too much they end up failing to see flaws in those people,  and when the flaws are too big to be hidden they end up becoming too ashamed to walk away because everyone will think that they were too drunk in love to see that they were actually laying in the arms of a monster.  On the other hand a lot of us are afraid of starting over,  the thought of finding someone new, falling in love all over again and learning new patterns is reason enough for us to stay in toxic relationships.   At one stage in my life i have also being a victim of such, the thought of having to explain to my colleagues why the person i once claimed nothing could ever tear us apart was no longer in the picture was too embarrassing, and yes it made more sense to stay in that hopeless and hurtful predicament.  Needless to say that his cheating ways knocked sense into my senseless pride and i walked as fast as my feet could allow me.  What I'm trying to say is,  if you still feel like you are being taken for a fool every time your partner gives you an excuse for not picking up your call or if you are still not a part of your partners inner circle you are in the wrong place.  A person who wants you in their life will always include you in their plans and there is no other place they would rather be if it means you they can't take you with.  You know you have landed yourself a keeper if you are all they think about and if they go out of their way to make you happy and at peace.  The only thing you can do is to love them and assure them that they will always be cherished.

It doesn't hurt to appreciate those who love you,  remember love is not proud, love is not selfish and love knows no evil...❤❤❤❤ 

PHENOMENAL WOMAN

Botle Kayamba Tladi is  humble, a lover of life, a cover girl and a brand ambassador.  To many of us she Mpile as we affectionately know her, she and her twin sister have always being fearless and unapologetic when it came to how they carried themselves.  I have known them to be bubbly and loving,  As a career woman she continues to push boundaries and today we get to have a front row experience on who she is as an adult.  This is what she had to say:
Botle is a mom, wife, sister, daughter, cover girl for a fitness magazine and an adidas brand ambassador who believes in God.
Botle is a full time fitness trainer.
In your career your favourite project is myself, as I have grown so much over the years and every day I discover something new about myself that I never thought I had.  The other one is working with people( my clients) and seeing them transform right before my eyes, it so fulfilling and motivating it helps me to keep pushing as I realise that most of them draw inspiration from me.
As an achiever do you think that you have arrived?  Not quiet, I am still "a work in progress" As I would love to have my own gym, a fitness show and publish a first ever black owned fitness magazine.(*_*)
Success is a status of having achieved and accomplished something that I have been trying to do,  My success is also measured by my happiness and my state of mind in terms of what I think of myself
As wife and a mother I thank God everyday for blessing with such a loving and supportive husband because it gets hectic at times to strike a balance between my family and my career and in those moments my husband helps with house chores,  and I don't have to worry about anything else because he is behind me 100%.  I am forever grateful and I love him for that.
Your thoughts on patriarchy are that is still exists and it will take a long time before we can completely get rid of it as there are still women getting paid less salaries as compared to their male counterparts for the same position.
A legacy you would love to leave your son is for him to know that he can be everything he wants, I want him to know that his dreams are valid and he must never stop chasing after them,  I want him to be proud of himself and never give up.
Have you and your sister always had your lives figured out? ( Chuckles) It is by God's grace really.  We both have a fighting spirit and don't give up easily,  I thank God because we are each other's source of inspiration.
When the hustle and bustle of life gets too hectic I pray a lot and meditate on the word of God, I always refer back to what God says about me and my approach to life is always directed by his word.
I would like for everyone out there who is discouraged  to BELIEVE in themselves, find their CALLING/PURPOSE/TALENT and Use what you have.

 

👨👨👨BE THE KIND OF A MAN

To a lot of women that have been done dirty by men see men as pigs with penises, or trash, or scum or any other bad or disregarded thing you can think of.  To the entire world men are associated with power or respect,  i think being a men has nothing to do with gender or social status.  But to me being a man is knowing your worth and the worth of those around you, It is you protecting the the heritage to the word man.  I think being a man is a measure of your level of maturity.  It is said that most men will proclaim each their own goodness, but a just man who can find?.  He walks in integrity and his children are blessed after him.  To me being a man is you understanding that everything you do will eventually affect the out come or even the comfort of your children and ultimately their children.  A good man will never go around telling people how good he is as a man, but he will be a pillar of strength to those who are weak, a shoulder to lean on when times are tough. He is a giver not a taker, he is a protector not a tormentor, he is a sower of good seed.  He is a man who can't afford to have a bad reputation, a man who is unsettled by seeing the weak tormented,  he is strong yet gentle, he is firm yet so kind.  He is a man.

Be the kind of a man that every woman would want to have, the kind of a man every kid would want to call their father and a  kind of a man every man would look up to.  A kind that is just and righteous, A kind that walks in integrity...👨👨👨

❤❤❤COMMITMENT, IS IT HARD?

Since today is Monday,  And I am kinda missing my Man Crush Everyday.  I am playing around with the thought having to one day commit to the same person for a lifetime and well that scares the living lights out of me.  I am frightened by the thought of commitment and the funny part is that, commitment scares me not because i can't commit, but it is because i take commitment too seriously.   Seriously to a point that a stranger can walk up to me and to look after something as small as a bag and no matter how worn out the bag may seem, I would be frustrated by questions that would run through my mind, I would ask myself if i would be able to recognize the owner when they come back, or what if someone comes from nowhere and snatches the bag and i am unable catch them.  I would be worried by the responsibility of being entrusted with someones treasure long after the owner has thanked me and went on with their business.  To me commitment is putting the wellbeing of what you are committed to first and your needs last,  It is you always being conscious of the fact that you have taken an oath to be true and entirely invested in what you have committed yourself to. And other day my #MCE said he is for someone who is both mindful and emotional and in short he said someone who is an individual, someone who happy and complete on their own and yet sensitive and submissive to him as a man, someone who will allow him the space to be her protector and sanctuary.  As beautiful as that may sound, to someone who has learnt to fight and fend for themselves their whole lives its a task.  Having to rely on someone else emotionally and letting them be your source of strength will require a lot of getting used to.  So in a nutshell making a promise and sticking to it even if things change is key.  Respecting your commitment when it no longer makes sense to do so is also important, however my advise is that learn about whatever you plan on committing to and have a clear understanding of it. that will save you the trouble of staying in situations that are not happy or healthy all in the name of  respecting a promise you made out of an uninformed excitement...

Love truthful and commit wholeheartedly and life will treat you well❤❤❤ 

💋💋💋KISSING A SILENT WAY OF...

Kissing in many cultures and societies is seen and received in many different ways,  in my community it is regarded as a foreign act especially when people do it in public spaces.  And in my family, especially on my father's side it is how we show each other affection, if we are happy to see each or we haven't seen each other in a long time as that is often the case.  Yes we live too far apart and we hardly see each other and when we see each other we would give each other soft pecks on the lips and this is not reserved for any gender, but within the youth, we prefer to stick to hugging, imagine kissing that hot cousin, when you hardly have any hotties looking your way.  I guess my family is my biggest influence for being such a kisser.  I kiss my friends when I'm happy to see them,  I kiss children so much so that they end up believing that if a person doesn't want to kiss them its a sign that of anger or resentment.  Then the kissing in an intimate relationship, there my friend you have to have a special kind of a skill to keep me happy.  I mean I am a serial kisser and the lips, the lips have to be soft, juicy and succulent.  They have to have a certain colour to them a colour that says this is not just an act but it is an act of generosity, an act of kindness, a level to a sacred ritual, to me kissing doesn't just mean you are attracted to me, it means we share a spiritual bond,  It is a silent code we use to express words we don't know how to utter, a way we transfer messages to the heart without letting out words to me kissing is a qualifying criteria of how good you are as a lover.

Close your eyes, kiss slowly yet passionately, don't think about anything but the pleasure that you will find in the act you are engaged in...
 

IS JEALOUSY BRED BY UNCERTAINTY?

We call jealously by a lot of names and the most famous one is "The green eyed monster."  The saddest thing is jealous people are insane enough to be the most cruel people on earth.  We would say all sorts of things to and about jealous people.  However we are never aware of the breeding ground of their sudden odd behavior.  In my experience i have learnt that when we worry about not making any progress in life and our counterparts are equally in the same predicaments it is often easy to find comfort in the fact that we share common ground.  And then boom! the worst happens and those we thought are in our level move up in life and we realise that they never had our backs.  We actually learn the harsh reality that they never saw themselves as our equals,  yes they have always felt that they above us.  They have moved up because they hated being a part of our circle "The loozers."  They had a smart way of proving that to us by working on succeeding and coming back to share how stressful life is,  how hard hustling is,  but they never invited us when they decided to hustle and yes we hate them.  Yes we are not happy to see them and yes we find their stupid conversations annoying.  So before you judge a jealous person, stop for moment and consider the fact that they might not necessarily hate you or your success but they might hate the fact that they see you doing something about your life yet their lives are stuck in the same uncomfortable spot and it might hurt.

Be a little considerate when sharing you achievements and yes sometimes its better to vanish a little it make things less awkward.

❤❤❤❤

💕💕LOVE IS

I am sure by now, you have realized that love is the fuel that helps me to thrive.  To me love is knowing that there is someone out there who is afraid of making life changing mistakes because they are looking forward to the day they get meet me. love is doing good by people who under appreciate your efforts yet you still find it in your heart to do good by them.  love is being a support structure to a friend who fails to notice when you are hurt and never takes the time to ask you" how are you doing?"  Love is waking up happy because you made someone else smile the previous day.  love is you living your life knowing that there are innocent lives watching through cracked windows and shattered dreams looking at you as a reflection of hope. love is you being hurt so bad that you lie in your bed, your pillow soaked with tears from broken promises and a lump of painful goodbyes on your throat.  Yet when the morning arrives you are the first to wake up, look at your swollen face and say "its a new day."  let us go and change a life.  Love is you loving yourself enough to know that your pain is not worth your happiness and your tormentors are not worth the change in good manners.  Love is you loving yourself enough to walk away from spaces that make you forget who you once where.

Its a Wednesday, be wise and love yourself before you attempt to love anyone else

THE GIRL CODE

The other day i was talking to one my girls and as usual we would talk about a load of rubbish.  In the mist of the babbling we stumbled upon a very sensitive topic for some people which for me is kinda meaningless, most people feel that if a guy dates a friend and they happen to breakup its taboo for her friends to take interest in him, in other words he is forbidden fruit.  I think its absurd we already have a shortage in the male species not to mention the good and hot ones and now we have to add to the struggle by having senseless rules, i am the friend who will wish good for my friends but if a guy happens to like you and you don't love him back, what must happen to his love? let us return the love, it is wrong for love to come and go back to the sender void.  In a nutshell I'm saying it is pure evil and selfish for one not want someone and deny their friends the chance of receiving the love they felt they didn't need.  What if destiny has our names written in the stars?  What if he liked you as a childish crush?   And 20 years later you still feel you are entitled to that person?  I have a few words for you my friend " grow up."  I don't mean to insensitive but i strongly believe in fate and i believe that we are no longer people we once were in our teen years. Pre-destiny is often mysterious and sometimes that guy was brought to your lives for a reason. However loving you at that time was not the right thing and maybe the relationship would have destroyed both parties involved.  Let us change the girl code to the woman code and take note of the following.  Do not stick you nose in your friends business, stay away from your friends current partner and if the breakup was messy do not flaunt your friendship in your friends face.  Choose to be happy, worry less and let your spirit be free...

I am free to be me and I am free to love you and all your flaws

❤❤❤❤❤
 

Are you looking for me?

I am sitting here and my thoughts are wondering away to a place only my dreams can take me, a place far from the worries and cares of the world, a place his in the hills, a place shadowed by big trees, a place  so clear for me, i can recognize the color of the couch, it is a color that says don't be careless when you snuggle on top of me, but remember to be comfortable, the throw is safely draped across it, which gives it a fresh and yet warm look, the color of the walls are white, pure, loving and kind. This place is heavenly, it is where my heart wants to dwell for all eternity, it is where my love lives.  I can almost see him tucking his warm self near my cold feet, i can almost feel his warm, firm but yet loving hands taking my feet with the hope of making them warm, i can almost smell him, his scent it is manly and yet soft, i can almost feel the soft pecks of his lips on my forehead and his hand running through my hair, i can almost feel his warm breath across my neck.  He is saying something, something only my heart can hear, he is saying he never stopped looking for me, he points out to glass doors on his balcony and tells me of how often he would stand there looking at the passersby hoping i would look up and wave back at him.  He always wondered if i had been looking for him, little does he know.  I can almost hear him say " Stay here forever." I can almost, no I can hear him, I can't see him, he only lives in my dreams.  He is just a memory in my spirit and my mind knows him not...

❤❤❤

Love is a doing word

We often believe that love is when, those you love put you first, spend their last dime on you or don't hurt you.  But i think love is what you put out there,  today i saw a group of young boys and one of them just said to me " I love you too." 
My initial thought was that his grammar was just wrong and it hit me, we can go through life trying to correct silly mistakes others make trying to impress us or we can just receive what they giving.  I love young children i believe human beings are the smartest when they are young and the innocence is just too cute.  Those boys do not know me, they don't even know how i feel about them,  however they received that love and they gave it back to me.  It put a smile on my face and it did the same to them, we both won.

Give your best at all times and it will always come back to you.

love loves love❤❤❤❤❤ 

IS LIFE LOOSING ITS WORTH?

I am beside myself with worry and shock at how the value of life is quickly deterioting.  Just a few weeks ago a grown man was boasting about how lucky he was to have meterial wealth that a lot of us will only get to see in the magazines and on high end lifestyle tv shows, to his surprise later that day he had made a fatal blunder in the quest of showing everyone who cared to glance his direction how amusing life was for him,  i think for a second there he thought he had the keys to life itself in the pocket of his designer jeans and before he could realise that life was not determined by those who were privileged ti live it, he had sent two of his friends to early graves and unlike him they had not had the chance to live long enough to be able to can afford the life he had.

As we came to terms with that unfortunate ordeal we learned of another fatal blunder that claimed a life of an innocent pedesrian who was on her way home from work.  I am calling this accidents blunders because they could have been avoided.  This one is more painful because these motorists were racing on a busy road and their ignorance claimed someone's life in the most gruesome manner, as the deceased was cut into limbs due to being hit by that car and to make matters worse the perpetrator fled the seen, how cold have we gone as human beings that one can commit such an aweful thing and only care about himself going to jail?

And the last one that sent me to a young coma only in my spirit though, was the knowledge that a newborn infant was dumped at a dumping site.  This act of evil doing happened five minutes from where I stay.  What mother does that? What kind of woman carries a child for months and then decides to dump them in a bag?  I think we as the human race are so caught up in achieving comfortable lives that we have forgotten that a true legacy one can live behind is a legacy that the generation to come will feel the need to carry forward. The human race has become so individual based that people only care about their own gratification not even stopping for a moment tho check who gets hurt in the process,  we have become so self centred that we no longer even know what the term loved ones mean.  My challenge to everyone who will read this piece is that you look around you and have a sense of community, look around and fix that which is within your reach.  I say we cannot afford to loose the core of life to self satisfaction.  After all life is meant meant to be generational.

❤❤❤

My WOMAN CRUSH WEDNESDAY

Good morning

Like I promised you yesterday, I am beginning my series on people who have had an impact on my life to this day and i have decided to kick my series of most influential people in my life with my best friend Jane

We met in high school and she was from a more improved side of the township and that automatically turned her in to a snob.  However her being the kind spirited person that she is, she quickly became that person that i knew even if my friends where not at school she was someone i would call my safe space. And soon it became evident that our friendship was written in the stars as she was and still is the most musical person i know, with a voice of an angel.  How we became friends is a story for another day, but this person changed my life. Before i met her i was a very short tempered brat and as teenage girls we would have arguments which none of us would win. I recall on this this one crazy afternoon we had an argument, I don't remember the details but i recall that it was petty and we were angry at each other as we parted ways. And the next day i woke up and told my senseless 15 year old self that i did not need her anyway.  As I arrived at the assembly grounds she was so happy to see me and she waved like someone who had not seen me in years, and from that very moment I realized that temper was a thief as i almost lost a sister and a friend over pride and stupidity and she became my go to for everything. she gave me her shoes when i did not have any. she bought me food when i did not have some. Jane taught me forgiveness, she taught me to give without expecting anything in return and above everything she taught me love beyond limits.

That is why is my WCW of choice now and forever, she is one person i feel deserves all the best life has to offer because she always offers her all...

I LOVE MY MOTSWI 💕💕💕 

Breaking out of my shell

Good morning my BELOVED

It is with great pleasure to let you know that as of tomorrow I will be taking through my personal journey of how I found myself, and got to be this vibrant and loving human being i have become. I will be sharing with you puzzles and snippets of my community of people and moments that have played a role in my Vaal triangle experience. I have had a pleasure of meeting trailblazers, ground breakers and trendsetters and i hope you enjoy this joy ride with me.

Ps; Beloved feel free to rate and comment on my post, I am dying to hear from you...

#ThursdayThoughts

I lay in bed and thought about the previous day and it came to my mind how people tend to make decisions out of the pride that come back to haunt them, as my former boss would say "You are shooting your own nose to spite your face." We make haste decisions and in the quest of being right and proving others wrong we find ourselves hurt, hateful and bitter.

To be a sacrificial lamb or not?

I am not sure if it's being sacrificial or it is being wise, but I'll say if something makes you happy and it ignites a spark in your life, if it is the epitome of your existence never let it go, not unless it becomes toxic then yes you'll have to remove yourself. But if it is responsible for your smiles and tears of joy, I say stay, stay, stay. We only live once and well we can't miss opportunities to live our lives to the fullest

Happy Thursday

Choose Day

Good morning my munchies, i hope you are having a great day and you have chosen the best only for today.

As for me today i have chosen forgiveness.  I have chosen to forgive myself for being apologetic about where i'm headed and those i have chosen to love.  I have forgiven myself for believing that i was a fool for letting myself to love them.  In all of that i have chosen to look back and smile At the reasons that has made me to fall in love with them,  So instead of kicking yourself for the choices you made in the past, rather look back and say" oh, well, I can't believe that i have lived long enough to have experienced that and wow I can't believe that I am strong enough to have survived.

I personally have survived a nasty employment system, I have survived a lying and selfish partner and yes I have survived in the mist of a failed business and debt that is hanging on my head.

In my eyes nothing is too great for us to overcome and the greater the battle the greater the ability we have to defeat it...

Vaal in a nutshell: Thursday ThoughtsIs vengeance really the dictato...

Vaal in a nutshell: Thursday Thoughts

Is vengeance really the dictato...: Thursday Thoughts Is vengeance really the dictator of our thoughts?  I ask because the other day i saw a grown woman leave her niece's...

Vaal in a nutshell: Vaal in her eyesVaal in her eyes is my personal ...

Vaal in a nutshell: Vaal in her eyes

Vaal in her eyes is my personal ...: Vaal in her eyes Vaal in her eyes is my personal journey as a girl who was born in the east rand.  My family moved her when i was only Fou...

Thursday Thoughts

Is vengeance really the dictator of our thoughts?  I ask because the other day i saw a grown woman leave her niece's daughter whose mother had just passed away, to stay with someone who lives with a different girlfriend every week.  And the her sole reason was that the deceased was disrespectful. And what left me broken was the fact that an 8 year old had nothing to do with her mother ways.  I mean she also has the right to ask her why her mom was a single parent?  However she doesn't know all that, all she knows is that her mother died and she is left with people who don't love her.

I am a sucker for love, I believe love creates all things,  I believe it was not because of love or the lack of love or even just a mere longing of it, non of us would exist but to my surprise being hurt and and seeking revenge is what makes us thrive.  So let me ask this are as we the Vaalians going to let revenge and pain be a way one will recognize us?  We are all capable of love and forgiveness and we can get all of that right we can make our community a better place not a place where all the bad stats come from.

Vaal just live, love and laugh

Vaal in her eyes

Vaal in her eyes is my personal journey as a girl who was born in the east rand.  My family moved her when i was only Four years old and i felt that i will never belong here nor even fit in as i was a Kathorus girl through and through however it took a drastic turn of events and i was transferred to Heidelberg and life became difficult and beautiful at the same time, i dared to do things i never thought i was capable of and yes i loved all of it.  I am a free spirited person and yes i don't need to conform to anybodies standards, but did i know that?  I think i forgot and all i wanted to do was to have a job and afford all i liked and loved.

To my surprised the more i grew on the work front the unhappier i became and yes you guessed right i was slowly becoming depressed it made sense to think about suicide as i watched my life become something i did not know.  I was in debt, I was underpaid and I overworked and coming home to Sebokeng was the best moments of my whole existence and going back was the beginning of a new episode of self discovery and in all those long trips,  I realized that i was blessed to have been awarded such and opportunity to be part of the game changers and trailblazers of this beautiful place.

I would love to take you on this journey and I can promise you that you are going to love it